Happy Late Summer!
I hope you all are well.
Except for Jenna...I hope she is reaping what she has sown. Haha...such a loser.
I'm not saying….
….I understand anything about her but… I do not understand about the whole cake mix thing. She says she will bake a cake…with this cake mix…if she gets some arbitrary number of subscribers. The whole thing is so stupid I don't have the capacity to even try to think about it. The main question is Who Cares? Is there someone in the world that will subscribe so she can bake a cake? What if she lies and bakes the cake any way?……yeah, okay…WHO CARES? Is this what passes as content nowadays? We're doomed.
although still hot and we will have plenty more days of summer you can see the difference in the sun and air. I can't put it in poetic words like the pig shocker but you can feel it.
ReplyDeleteThank you for keeping this blog going.
Yes, thanks, HD. Too bad that a glitch on the platform prevents you from commenting. I miss hearing from you, too.
Delete"LS."
Not gonna lie; I admit I thought that description of waning summer light was pretty clever. But then again, we know she doesn't contain an ounce of creativity and can't "right" for shit so she definitely stole that from some old novel. You know, one of those heavy 2 lb books she lugs up hiking trails.
Delete(p.s. Good to see you, HD!)
Hi All,
ReplyDeleteWelcome back DM! It's good to hear your updates. And Anon7, you're probably right - I've also had problems publishing comments! My computer runs Chrome (so fixable).
Ahh, where to start? Until 10 days ago, I've been offline literally. Tropical Storm Isaias took out five large trees on our property and power, internet and phone were out for eight days! Most local roads were impassable. In fact nearly 800,000 people were affected, so we weren't alone. Being without water for farm animals is bad - each large animal can easily drink 10 gallons per day of water. Fortunately, the town fire department offered emergency water so 55-gal drums could be filled up and returned.
But I'm back and more or less caught up with the summer ������ show that we comment on.
First, can I say how appalling her meals are? Filled with sugary syrups, they are cringe-inducing, gloppy and fatty. I can only assume this is done to hide the taste of her garbage meat. She frequently posts that "her" food is what farmers eat, but her routinely oversweetened "cooking" isn't what farmers eat where I live. They forage for wild mushroom, steam exotic greens, lightly grill and broil meats and prefer clean, fresh flavors. Our CSA promotes sustainable and healthy options. Really, her approaches to food are 1950s Betty Crocker. Eat lots of meat and smother with Barbeque sauce, brown sugar, maple syrup etc. The only people I've seen who routinely devour so much sugar & fats are children, people without access to good food and heavy drinkers. OMG, no wonder she has diet issues.
Second, I'm curious what act she will next put on. Early on, I commented on the assorted people she parisitized to create her fake feral image.
>There was the Shepherdess in UK, who raised healthy sheep on hillsides, sold wool shares, had working border collies and photo-documented her pastoral days.
>Then there was Twwly in Canada, who I believe, moved FFF in the direction of goth symbols, exotic interior photos and the concept of Carhart-wearing badass outdoor femininity - "strong feral women". However, Twwly lived the life & properly cared for the animals she raised, going so far as to denigrate FFF's selfish, selfish practice of stealing lambs and kids from their parents so she could use them for photo opportunities.
>Let's not forget the impact of continued pandering to her imaginary NYC social media "friends". It must be a real struggle to appear interesting to trust-fund babies and hipster friends. She's turned herself into an anachronistic feral "farmer girl", sitting on her haunches, eating like a Yeti, hoping like hell this makes her hip, and edgy and cool. Sad that she doesn't recognise their pitiful but amused interest in the freak show she's created.
PDD. Glad that you're okay. We had a power outage in our area of Vermont, too. Her fatty foods always look disgusting to me. And her obese body is a reflection of the high calorie content, and also lying about running/hiking. Your last well-put paragraph perfectly describes her lazy lifestyle:
Delete">Let's not forget the impact of continued pandering to her imaginary NYC social media "friends". It must be a real struggle to appear interesting to trust-fund babies and hipster friends. She's turned herself into an anachronistic feral "farmer girl", sitting on her haunches, eating like a Yeti, hoping like hell this makes her hip, and edgy and cool. Sad that she doesn't recognise their pitiful but amused interest in the freak show she's created."
"LS"
PDD, One only needs to look at Pig Shocker's morbidly obese body to see what a craptastic diet she consumes.
DeleteBald patches on her scalp, terrible skin, rotten teeth, poor vision as seen via her lazy eye and thick coke bottle glasses and who can forget the intertube of fat around her mid section.
No matter how many lies she tells about daily mile runs and river swims, it's evident by her Sasquatch physique that she only runs from responsibility and hard work.
Poods - What a difficult times but glad you made it through! Trees are so beautiful and take so long to grow, so I share in your sadness. And to go thru all that during this pandemic...no one deserves that. Glad things are better for you.
DeleteHer meal pics gross me out too. Even the pizzas (my favorite food) are tainted due to the thought of them being prepared with the filthiest hands ever. Ugh. As for Twwly (who I still follow) I also agree that the Pig Shocker has appropriated lots of things in order to try to look as cool as Twwly, who is an awesome and real Canadian homesteader. And she she seems to do it effortlessly...and without daily begging. Grace and beauty she is. And honest, hardworking.
As for Jenna trying to pander to NYC hipsters, hopefully they can see thru her and see that she's not hip, edgy and cool. She's an idiot full of stool.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention her latest barf-inducing blog. Despite having told the world she was okay with hay in June, the little pig shocking pencil girl now laments her tiny stash of hay & her attempts to buy hay before winter's butt crack. Let's put it into perspective. At most, her two pet horses eat 1/2 bale each per day, so she needs 1 bale per day to feed them. 25 bales (~$125) is about a month's worth of hay for her toys. Make no mistake, the horses are pets, not working farm animals and they are a useless hipster farmer-wannabe expense. Frost will hit in November, so she needs hay for ~six months or 180 bales. I have no idea why she's doing this 25 bales at a time, but this amount can be shoved into the back of a pick-up truck (hello, PP). And it sounds suitably pathetic. "Help me. Only 25 bales. So little but it's a start to fill their bellies... PayPal me bitc***."
ReplyDeleteAlso, aren't her continual whines about mortgage payments tiring to all but a few of her fans? I agree with all of you that she must have other sources of money. Our mortgage is due on the first of each month, but payments are not "late" unless they are received by the bank after the 16th of each month. It sounds like she has the same arrangement.
So why the non-stop begging? She craves attention and admiration (she's admitted this many times). Her writing talent is mediocre, her fame was fleeting and she's no longer a young and eager farmer, learning and sharing as she takes on small-scale "farming". Alas, her dream is long since passed and general sloth is the more defining aspect of her. "Dust around the cat" indeed.
So she plays the victim and tries hard to stay relevant. Desperate, but way too lazy to re-engineer her failing farm or life.
Oddly, she's satisfied being an embarrassment - airing her woes, publicly whining and pleading for cash handouts and sales leads. If she picks up free money, or the occasional bit of work, so much the better. She is living her preferred LAF lifestyle.
She reads CAST, so this message (again) is for her. I wish she would pick out another persona to try out and write about. Maybe her hipster, aging lesbian could re-home the animals, sell the house, buy a red Mustang and move to a condo in TN, nevermore bothering livestock or wild raptors who should be left the fcuk alone by her!
Do it!
I would LOVE to see her sell up and reinvent herself. She's only 40, plenty of time to start something new, make something of her life, go live in a university town with lots of other queer folks and figure out how to live life without borrowing pieces of other people's personas.
DeleteThe would make her blog interesting again too. Go do something else, be someone else. I don't care how comfortable she is with her past choices, she gets to make new ones every day.
I would be her biggest fuckin' cheerleader if she took an honest swing at life instead of this rut, and using animals to try and keep her relevant.
That's the only reason she's going to catch another hawk - purely to prop up her problematic persona.
WiW: NAILED IT: "That's the only reason she's going to catch another hawk - purely to prop up her problematic persona." I like the alliteration, too.
Delete"LS"
OH, I couldn't agree more. The Pig Shocker clearly stated in June that her and Patty had enough hay to get thru winter. And now this new bullshit "I need hay" claim?
DeleteAnd why all the non-stop begging? Well, I thought for a long time that it was for her mortgage, but now I'm really starting to believe (thanks to others here) that she has that covered and her begging is for fun stuff only: Mountain smashing clothes and equipment, booze, Subway, monkey dresses, and all things Taylor Swift.
WIW - Reinvent herself? No, she needs to climb back down underneath the rock from which she emerged. And needs to take all her Taylor Swift crap with her too.
Well, I'd prefer she stay out of the south PDD! But all other suggestions are great. Hey DM! I love the summer update. I can always tell fall is not far away (though it will stay hot until October often) when the goldfinches show up to snack on my coneflowers and black eyed susans.
ReplyDeleteMy home office window is currently looking out on butternut squash vines and cucumber vines growing 8 feet high on a trellis in my urban side yard. (though one squash has gone rogue and is climbing the gate into my back yard! Tomatoes are slowing down, peppers are booming, basil is running amok so there is pesto making and freezing that will happen this weekend. Before I started losing the battle for figs with the birds this week, I have given away pints and pints, made ginger fig butter, eaten them for at least 1 meal a day, and dried them for trail mix. Sweet potatoes will be ready to harvest in about 1 1/2 weeks. I usually have enough sweet potatoes and butternut squash to eat through March. The garlic I raised will last until then or later plus provide what I need to plant in October for next year's crop.
I have started my fall veggies and am re-potting them today to get them ready to plant out in about a month. So much from a small space and all while I work (more than) full time.
Hope all the rest of the shamsters are enjoying the last weeks of summer.
Anon in GA
Anon in GA - Your life sounds dreamy. All that green...and all those delicious things you have growing. The fresh air. *sigh* I am in a city where all I see is cement, too many cars, stucco buildings and telephone poles galore. And so I just love it when you and others here write about what it's like to live in nice areas with less traffic, pollution, etc. Not to mention all the animal talk, especially bird talk!
DeleteThanks Anon7. Actually I live in the city on the "bad" side of town, but have committed a lot of my yard to food and flowers vs. lawn. I am learning to squeeze a lot out of a small space after growing up with the traditional big garden with rows. I have fruit trees and bushes in the back yard and the veggies are in a south-facing side yard in 2 8x4' beds, 1 4x4' bed, and 2 watering tanks from tractor supply. I have herbs scattered among the front yard flower beds. I also do keep a 10x4' bed at a community garden in the neighborhood - helped start it with another neighbor 12 years ago and it is still a special place, though not where I grow most of my food.
DeleteAnon 7:14 is Anon in GA
Deletewell it is time........ in fact past time now the truck has broken down. We all knew it was going to happen. So when we get "donations" for this then time to move on to the teeth problems. Then we will be back to something happening to the animals if people don't donate to pig shocker so she can buy more hay. A real circle to say the least.
ReplyDeleteAnd how the hell did her timeline work out in the series of tweets? In the last 5 hours she spent "most of the morning" on a logo, picked a tomato, drove somewhere and tried to work on her truck, then had time to discover TS dropped signed CD's she didn't get to buy, did some sales and political posts and then spent another hour working on the truck and posted about it twice in half an hour.
DeleteRiiigghhht. My guess is someone supposedly "gifts" her the signed CD or she finds it at the dump that she was ordering and then deciding the truck needed to break down.
I looked for the store label on that tomato! Imagine a "dirt farmer" not knowing the type of tomato she planted. She's as ignorant about plants as animals, so perhaps she'll next write a book on gardening.
DeleteShe should make a new, hokey Hobbit map to try and track her lying about bullshit. Here's an example for newbies:
Deletehttps://twitter.com/coldantlerfarm/status/1043317520051171329
"LS"
Yup - Truck problems, root canals...what's next? Oh! She's gonna sweep under her sofa and find an old "cancer threat" post-it reminder she forgot to tweet about. Yeah, my money's on that. Although now that she's dating, perhaps a burning STD will be her next go-to issue? Maybe crabs -- which would be a boon to her as she can add them to her sugary syrup pork skillet meals.
DeleteAnd LS - Those "hobbit maps" -- do you think, if she truly lived on a mountain in the middle of nowhere, with no internet audience...do you think she'd take the time to draw up silly maps like that just for herself? For her own entertainment?
Nope. The sole purpose of her hobbit maps is to entice a bunch of internet strangers into thinking she's a super unique person, one who is worthy of your hard-earned paycheck.
yep right on schedule she needs pictures of puppies or some crazy thing. She is so down she had no sales today. Annon.1:14 is right how the hell does anyone do all of that in one morning? She will be so happy when she gets her CD's and we all know she will and of course a "fan" got them for her. After we have posted it here she probably won't admit to it though.
ReplyDelete"Woke Wog" often uses this manipulative marketing technique when she's not getting enough free funds. She'll ask for either puppy pics, or other nonsensical crap to try and draw attention to her pathetic pleas for donations. Her refusal to support her fat ass like a normal adult is extremely immature and probably pathological .
Delete"LS"
Yeah, it's funny how she blamed not being able to buy a limited signed Taylor Swift CD on her truck problems:
Delete"Of course while I was on my back, on the side of the road, under my 1989 truck, trying to pull out the muffler that rusted completely off @taylorswift13 dropped signed cds for the US. and they are all sold out. If I ever meet her she's signing that muffler."
First off, the Pig Shocker wasn't able to buy that coveted CD because she didn't make enough donations this week. But yeah, blame it on a muffler. Also, why does she need a signed CD? Does it sound different somehow?
Second, did you see what she did there? She mentioned that her truck is an 1989 model which is the same year Taylor was born, and was also the title of one of her past albums. And she desperately used "@tayorswift13" which means her tweet will go directly onto TS's feed and perhaps Taylor will read it! And then will send Jenna a signed CD! No wait, even better...Taylor will personally drive and deliver the CD in person! And then she will talk to her Hollywood friends to see if they'll make a movie about feral Jenna!
Third: If Taylor Swift ever has the misfortune to meet the Pig Shocker, she'll be signing off on a restraining order, not a rusted out muffler.
Anon7 🤣🤣🤣!
DeleteI think if she could just get TS to deliver the CD, they'd fall madly in love and live happily ever after.
DeleteAnonymous 1:37. A garbage human like the FFF is only another consumer of her music to TS. And if they ever met at an event, which is highly unlikely in real life, then TS would wipe PS off her feet like rancid dog shit. "Could you puhleeze autograph my filthy kilts?!"
DeleteMortgage, mortgage, mortgage. Is this all she writes about now? Bitch is boring! Oh that and her truck is broken down. AGAIN. Next we will hear about her teeth.
ReplyDeleteAnd why did she pick a muffler of all problems? Any car or truck can drive without one. Yeah, it's not legal, and your ride is gonna be noisy, not to mention smog concerns, spark arresting inabilities, etc. But you can still drive it. Although you shouldn't. And anyway, didn't she say many times in the past that her reason for having TWO horses was because she could use them to go to down if her truck broke? So full of lies she is.
DeleteAnon7, She picked the muffler so she could lie and say she was under the truck on the side of the road.
DeleteWe all know that IF her muffler was hanging off, she would drag that SOB until it flew off on it's own and went thru someone's windshield.
Something she says quite often is the misuse of the words terrify, terrifying or terrified. I don't think she knows the true meaning of the word. I am 70 years old and I feel very grateful to only have be afraid once in my life and that was in 2011 when my son and his family were involved in the earthquake and tsunami in Sendai, Japan and we didn't hear from him for 3 days....long, long days.
ReplyDelete(He finally returned to their apartment to see what was what and contacted us.) Most of the time, when you are "terrified " of something, you take steps to deal with it as best you can. Be it illness, no money, a man stopping in the driveway, making a bad decision, whatever, you deal with it. Autumn sun slant doesn't bother me a bit.
Like many others over the years, I've dealt with major illnesses, 7 children and their related situations, wonderful traveling (sometimes alone} And you deal with it.
Juse
Sorry. my name should be Jude in the above comment.
Delete"Hey Jude." (Sorry, couldn't resist the song pun.) I've often mentioned her manipulative marketing techniques. I think that her usage of "terrified" is mostly to elicit donations from foolish followers. If she were really that constantly scared, then changes would've been made years ago. She's a scamming socipathic POS who knows which words will drum up mortgage money.
Delete"LS"
Love your name, Jude! And yes, you are totally right. Terror is not a word to use lightly. I remember that particular earthquake and tsunami. The pictures were devastating to look at. But glad to hear you, your son and family were ok.
DeleteThe bleg entry that Jude is referring is titled "The First Tired Light" (8/20):
"It's older now, the summer I mean, and it feels tired. The pace of the light's run is slower, if that makes sense? Like it's the same strong beast, but carrying a full pack uphill. And on mornings like this, these weird in-between moments, it is both beautiful and terrifying."
So Jenna sees her shadow is longer now? And that's terrifying? Sounds more like she's shadow-boxing with her inability to make her "income goal" before the sun sets.
Jude, so true. I am 70 years also and my son was in Japan during the 2011 earthquake. Same son was visiting Washington DC when 9/11 happened. Controlled terror until we knew he was safe. The feral farmer is afraid of her own shadow. Maybe she just needs the drama
ReplyDeletebut I think she needs counseling ...her terror is not normal.
P.B.
P. B. Thank you for your acknowledgement. I really had to think about the word terror and what it meant to me and nothing matched up with what she talks about. I read and watch a lot of stuff. Hobbits never once have come up.. My family is from Poland, Russia and Germany and she ought to try on the words Nazi instead of hobbit or "hobbit map".
Delete' hobbit map to sobriety. Even having been born here, the word Nazi makes me think of the word "terrify.'
My ancestors are also from the "old country" (Poland), and they experienced the Holocaust horrors firsthand. JFW doesn't know the true meaning of any form of "terror." She's had help her entire life. Which is why she's a lazy lifestyle loser who has no concept of how to work for a living.
Delete"LS"
True terror is:
Delete-What happened to everyone present or near ground zero on 9/11
-Seeing that your six-month old baby is not breathing and is blue
-Hitting the brakes in your car and nothing happens
-Experiencing a devastating earthquake; or seeing your house on fire
-------------------------
"Terror" for Jenna Woginrich:
-Bank balance down to single digits
-Scary red van (bank) man with camera
-Mortgage payment due
-Creepy laundromat guy giving the stink eye
-Having to look in a mirror
-Waking up two hours after liquor store closed
-Mama Wog called to talk about family shame
-No money for Taylor Swift concert tix (pre pandemic era)
-No hay. No firewood. The beginning of a fake tooth ache.
From the latest bleg post ("Grateful") the Pig Shocker writes:
ReplyDelete"One of the things I am most grateful for about being a homesteader right now, is winter prep. The work of hay and firewood..."
What does she mean by "work"? She just orders that stuff. She doesn't grow hay or process firewood. She simply "buys" it..with other people's money.
And the part where she calls herself a "homesteader" -- no, more like fundsteader.
in her last thing on twitter everything is about the food grown on the farm of my girl and "our" stuff she is making it all about them as a couple. And all about somewhat healthy meal they made. Poor girl run while you can.
ReplyDeleteIn her deluded mind, she now tweets that her cooking apples are from an apple tree SHE planted when she bought the farm. More 💩 💩 💩.
DeleteIsn't it enough to say she added apples to her Aldi-sale butternut squash? Now she has to have GROWN THE TREE? 😂😂😂
For newbies, a sizeable apple tree has been on/near her property & discussed for at least a decade, along with multiple photos. Obviously, the tree was already there, planted by a real homesteader, not a faux feral one.
Pig Shocker mentioned an "orchard" recently?
DeleteWhere exactly is the orchard located on her property? Next to the unmucked piles of fetid horseshit? Or maybe it's behind the barn that's going to collapse any day now?
Oh I know! Pig Shocker found an entire orchard at the dump!
Also, she hasn't mentioned her "girl" recently. She has mentioned her usual bs about finding love but hasn't mentioned her "girl" specifically.
Either the girlfriend bolted or she doesn't want to be associated with the likes of insane Pig Shocker.
If you are hanging out with someone who scams for a living and are enjoying the spoils of those scams, you are as equally a piece of shit as the scammer.
If you are in a romantic relationship with a documented animal abuser, you are complicit in the animal abuse.
What must everyone in Boston think about the girlfriend's new criminal way of life?
she is talking about now if you buy her "work" that it will buy 25 bales of hay. But she said before it costs $145. for 25 bales. We just can't get her stories straight for anything.
ReplyDeleteRight now, according to Craigslist, there's horse hay for sale at $3 and $3.25 per bale (1st cutting), only 15 miles away. Several other nearby hay suppliers listed hay at $3 and $4 per bale.
DeleteIf Jenna is writing about "farming", she's usually lying.
WHAT a wonder she mentioned she has now run 100 miles after stating a few days before that she hit 70 miles. How does a person out f shape run 30 miles in about 2 days time plus all of her "farming" her "art" her "soap making" (melting and pouring away)? Just amazing isn't she? NOT.
ReplyDeleteLol, check out her supposed challenge log:
Delete8/01 - Run 5 miles
8/01 - Walk 1 mile
8/02 - Run 3 miles
8/02 - Walk 1 mile
8/02 - Walk 2 miles
8/03 - Run 5 miles
8/03 - Walk 1 mile
8/03 - Walk 2 miles
8/04 - Run 1.5 miles
8/04 - Walk 0.5 mile
8/04 - Walk 1 mile
8/05 - Run 6 miles
8/05 - Walk 1 mile
8/06 - Run 2 miles
8/06 - Walk 3 miles
8/07 - Run 3 miles
8/07 - Walk 1 mile
8/07 - Walk 2 miles
8/08 - Hike 5 miles
8/09 - Walk 1 mile
8/10 - Run 2 miles
8/10 - Walk 1 mile
8/11 - Walk 1 mile
8/11 - Run 2.5 miles
8/11 - Walk 1.5 miles
8/11 - Walk 2 miles
8/12 - Run 5 miles
8/12 - Walk 1 mile
8/13 - Walk 2 miles
8/14 - Run 3 miles
8/14 - Walk 2 miles
8/15 - Run 2 miles
8/15 - Walk 3 miles
8/17 - Run 3 miles
8/17 - Walk 1 mile
8/17 - Walk 1 mile
8/18 - Run 3 miles
8/18 - Walk 1 mile
8/18 - Walk 1 mile
8/19 - Run 1 mile
8/19 - Walk 1 mile
8/19 - Walk 1 mile
8/20 - Run 3 miles
8/20 - Walk 1 mile
8/21 - Walk 2 miles
8/21 - Walk 1 mile
8/22 - Run 3 miles
8/22 - Walk 2 miles
8/23 - Walk 2 miles
I'm tempted to compare and contrast those miles with what she wrote on social media on those dates. But it seems an awful waste of time.
Full stats here:
https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/94206/IndividualResult/LdHD?resultSetId=202982#U45399999
Just muddled through her last 2 posts and, as usual, good grief with the BS.
ReplyDeleteShe is proud of making it "10 years" with a "harder lot" -- that nearly insurmountable obstacle of being a white, college-educated woman from a middle class background who had a salary and benefits?! It's just a miracle that she's overcome such trials to succeed at frittering away her career and begging online.
Sounds to me like the new GF (who she is now in love with) is kicking in some cash, though it doesn't seem like she is actually living there. That's not going to go well.
Did I miss actual repairs to her barn? Cause all this time before she had to bank hay partly because she couldn't store it in the barn. Isn't that roof about to fall in? Or, per usual, was she lying about the inability to store the hay on site before because that worked for her begging better, but now the opposite is true.
Anon in GA
She wrote something awhile back about barn repairs that had to do with the doors. Nothing was said about the loft. And then a week or so ago:
Delete""It's a start. 25 bales were delivered today and put up in the freshly cleaned-out and opened spaces in my small barn. I have another 175 to go..."
So the barn is suddenly able to store 200 bales? And note that she posted pics of her haying at Patty's -- but not a single pic of hay in her own barn.
Something I think we missed. In April she acquired 3 white lambs... she now has 2 white lambs and a black lamb.... what happened to the original 3rd white lamb? She states she has a flock of 3.... so white lamb number 3 must have been yet another Cold Antler victim.
ReplyDeleteOh wait... it may have been that she used an old recycled picture of lambs in her April photo of lambs outside the shed in a makeshift paddock... because a post or so later she has the picture of the 2 white and one black. I only skim her blog posts because they are repetitive and boring... I assumed that the initial picture of lambs was current to the farm year... but in reality they could have been from years ago.
DeleteRight, and what happened to the little pack goat she had? Did the serial animal killer kill that one too somehow? Forgot to feed it, let it freeze to death, etc.?
DeleteSomething died when she vague-posted about the "bad farm day". Goat or pig? Who knows. Sigh. I'm starting to think it was the goat. Maybe too high a worm load? Or an infection from the elastration?
DeleteFunny story, a friend of mine is an actual farmer, descended from farmers near Calgary. Farming country. She was helping a friend bundle wildflowers for wedding decorations, and they ran out of elastics. "Where is your elastrator?"
Subsequent bouquets were beautifully bundled with the elastrator. I will never see a bouquet of flowers now without thinking of an elastrator.
Oh look, she referred to the goat in her post today. Still alive, is he?
DeleteWho knows. She rarely posts photos knowing they draw so much criticism. That leaves the likely possibility it was a pig who died. Or maybe a barn cat. Sigh.
And don't forget on June 29th she received a trio of Yorkshire piglets:
Delete"They are small and too new to be set into the pig pen, so their short quarantine is in another pen where they are set up with good food, a small shelter, and fresh well water to learn to be a Cold Antler Farm Pig!"
The ONLY thing a CAF pig needs to learn is how to hide when the PS waddles up to the fencing with a bucket of water.
A prediction regarding PS said in her latest bleg post ("Rolling With It"):
ReplyDelete"I am feeling good this morning! Like good things are on the way. I don’t know what or how, but my heart just simply feels lighter. [...] Like things are going to be okay. [...] So I’m rolling with it. Feeling positive about the day ahead. Feeling like good things are coming my way. [...] And feel glad that I have working limbs and eyes and a heart to do so..."
If memory serves, the Pig Shocker has written fluffy drivel like this in the past, and then soon after she experiences some big tragic catastrophe of the "terrifying" variety: Total truck breakdown, power shut off, broken pipes, flooding, big unexpected bills, etc, ad nauseam.
So by writing about how "happy" she is and how everything is "just wonderful" (i.e. tethering people to her potential) she's hoping for extra sympathy and donations. She wants her foollowers to think, "On noes! Poor Jenna was soooo happy and optimistic the other day, and now this happens!!
And sadly, it works. Which is why she pulls this scam every so often.
Her purple prose posts are full of fucked-up magical thinking and "fluffy drivel." It's like I always say here, but it bears repeating, everything that JFW says or does is all about manipulative marketing. Once you see it her pattern becomes obvious.
Delete"LS"
yep! Shall we start fresh bingo cards? Or get a pool going?
Delete- truck repair
- tooth
- infection
- scary mail
I am glad she's not doing things like "antlerstock" anymore. That was a serious injury waiting to happen.
Almost five years later and her shit-show is still the same:
ReplyDeletehttp://highstfarm.blogspot.com/2015/10/what-toe.html
The comments are also spot-on. Here are just two. I'd take time and read them all:
DeleteAnonymousOctober 16, 2015 at 2:58 PM
"The entire time I've been a single woman, without a trust fund, scratching by to live the life of her dreams."
She needs a reality check. She's not "scratching". People with two jobs living in drafty trailers and eating cereal twice a day are scratching by. If you have the money to blow on vinyl and have so much free time that you can jog 7 miles a day and play around with a hawk and whatever else has captivated your pea-sized brain this week you are not having difficulty getting by. If your butt is perched on a bar stool at The Brewery every Thursday night you are doing just fine.
What an asshole.
"This is an uncomfortably personal story of one woman's life."
What story? Her blog is mostly ads for workshops and logos, ie veiled begs. On the rare occasion she writes any new content it's just a PSA about how fabulous she is.
"The real Jenna, if you ever do meet me, isn't refined either."
There was zero chance of disillusionment, fucktard.
Replies
AnonymousOctober 16, 2015 at 3:25 PM
You have just epitomized many of our feelings about her, but you said it more eloquently than I could have.
That comment section is a gold mine:
Delete"Top 10 most annoying CAF words or phrases:
10) Son
9) Darlings
8) Fall down the stairs amazing
7) Support this farm
6) Late mortgage
5) Vet bill
4) Badass
3) Wolves at the door
2) Scrappy
And the No. 1 most annoying phrase for 2015 is.........(drum roll)
1) ROOT CANAL!"
Folks, that was 5 years ago and she's still saying the same dumb shit. Except for the "falling down the stars amazing" -- I'll bet she drunkenly did do that and decided that it wasn't amazing after all.
In the last thread, Woe is Wog wrote a very insightful post that put into better perspective why the Pig Shocker won't get a job and struggles with every month being a "marathon" to get thru. As WIW put it, the PS is stubbornly refusing to give up her decade old dream because her pride won't allow that:
ReplyDelete"Is this REALLY her "dream"? Sometimes we start down a path because of a dream, but the lived reality isn't what we thought it was. So you adjust once you have more information.
FFF has come so far away from the "dream" she originally wrote about in Made From Scratch. She's not a shepherdess. She has a few lambs now that she's going to grow out and sell for meat, I assume. The sheep operation didn't work out. The lambing, the wool CSAs, the meat - none of it worked.
The pigs were a legitimate possibility to pivot towards, and she really could and should be doing that better by now. The pigs are the only possible venture that might turn a very tiny profit. The "shepherdess" dream which involved getting a border collie, and a second border collie, with no sheep to herd for years, was the justification for quitting the day job. "The farm needs me!" was really "it's lambing season and I'm overwhelmed / exhausted, and the solution must be to quit my day job so I can shift all my focus on to lambing when the season rolls around."
Dumb! It was clear the sheep were too much for her, but after failing at sheep, she started taking up all these hobbies to keep her busy. Horses. Goats. The fucking raptors that should just STAY in the WILD for the love of god! Those birds don't NEED her! Leave them alone!
Nothing about her cascade of irresponsible choices makes sense, and so many farmers ALSO HAVE JOBS! There's nothing noble about being an unemployed "dirt farmer". There are a million other businesses she could be running, but it's melt n pour soap, which is laughable as that can't be turning more than a couple of hundred dollars a month, and selling / reselling / scamming "meat shares".
You know what happens to farmers who run at a loss for 10 years? They go under. She's got secret white people money coming in from somewhere. Girl needs to be stocking shelves in a grocery store somewhere."
(My apologies to any other Shammers who may have posted something similar in the past. I think it was the "FFF has has come so far away from her dream" comment that made clear how ridiculous the Pig Shocker has become.)
thank you for bringing my comment forward, anon7
DeleteMy pleasure! And for a visual of how far away she is from her dream, just check out her YouTube video of her first year:
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWHOqgYIQ7Q
I only made it halfway thru cuz there are so many now-dead animals in that video, you can literally say "dead, dead, dead" to the beat of that song. And that made me sad.
UGH omg you're RIGHT!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭
DeleteI do not fault FFF for taking a swing at her "dream". But she had no business farming full-time after the wretched filth at the rented cabin.
She used to brag she "did it all without a business plan!" IT SHOWS. Business plans aren't uncool or non-creative - they aren't even likely to work out as planned - they just literally do the math and work out key figures to hit or miss, so you literally know where you are in relation to the business' survival. Not having a business plan meant she didn't pivot her approach or recognize her failures.
She holds the last 10 years up as though she's "living her dream" and is therefore a success. She reminds me of the business coaches who rent a mansion to film a video in so they can sell a fraudulent image of success and sell their "program" so that you, too, can live your dreams!
She used to be cute - marveling over vintage pyrex and swearing by her old suitcase organization system. Even her recipes and little detours into manual coffee grinders and beating cream by hand was kind of charming. But as soon as she started accumulating animals, things went sideways.
Twit Shit Minutes Ago:
ReplyDelete"No sales the past few days, getting nervous here. So if you want to help out and order soap, meat shares, design work, pet portraits, or just kick in towards the blog send me a DM! Trying to run this joint on fumes and luck."
Instead of "fumes and luck" she should get off her fat ass and get a job. "Nervous" is getting close to "terrified" for her. So it's almost time for her infamous "fraction finances." "I'm almost 1/4 of the way to paying my mortgage. PayPal me now, bitches!!!" We all know that those who "kick in towards the blog" are donating money for fun stuff like Taylor Swift sweatshirts, weird wolf contact lenses, and a new copy of "The Kama Sutra for Lesbians Living Alone Without Trust Funds."
"LS"
Ha...I just saw that. Well, at least she finally admits that her only efforts in keeping that farm are fumes and luck. Yeah, her bodily fumes and other people's luck.
Delete"Getting nervous here..." she has only HERSELF to blame for that. But expects online strangers to bail her out.
Also, the liar's last sale was $100 on Aug. 22nd. How did she manage to spend that much in just two days? Did Ben 'n Jerry raise their prices?
DeleteAnd even more stoopid twit shit:
ReplyDeleteRandom twitter user: "Happy LWYMMD Day to all 23 people who stan it!"
The Pig Shocker: "I AM ONE OF THE 23!!!"
And what is "LWYMMD" anyway?
Lying
Worthless
Year-long
Money
Mooching
Dipshit
Am I warm?
Three days ago the PS tweeted: "Today sucks. No sales. truck is out of commission, can't drive."
ReplyDeleteBut looky here what she wrote in today's bleg post:
"Yesterday was so humid and after my walk with the dogs I took Gibson over to the river to cool off."
and
"I have a small pile of soap orders to mail. Besides another small delivery of 25 bales of hay I have no plans beyond a trip to the post office."
How's she getting around town without a truck? On her own fumes?
she's takin' the pony to the post office doncha know?
Deletehttps://twitter.com/coldantlerfarm/status/1297995787864023051/photo/3
ReplyDeleteGreat Houndtor farm is using this logo. The other companies / farms either don't exist or don't have an internet presence. There are variations, like Smiling Dog Farms (plural) which is a dog rescue, and doesn't use this logo. Wouldn't that be hilarious if she was commissioned for a logo and got the name wrong? Not saying that's what happened here... but there doesn't seem to be a "smiling dog farm" and nothing that uses the logo.
"Next fall there will be a ram..." She's not talking about 2020, right? She means fall 2021? Yes?
ReplyDeleteBecause lambing worked out SO WELL last time, it can't be anything but successful with craigslist lambs and a human so shit at managing herself and her farm she writes about money woes more than anything else? What the hell happens if she needs to call a vet? Didn't she burn bridges with all the local vets?
Oh, she calls a vet when she needs one.
DeleteThen she jumps on social media and begs for the bill money.
Twit Shit:
ReplyDeleteI found out that LWYMMD Day = stupid song by Taylor Swift. Which is why the fat ass tweeted about it.
And:
"This was a good day.
I farmed. I mailed out 4 pet portraits and 2 soap orders. I worked on a friend's last-chemo treatment poster. I put up 25 more bails of hay. I made soap. I pet a goat. I wrote. I sweat. I ate. I was told I was loved.
This was a good day."
Plus:
"I know things are getting serious with my girlfriend because all of my targeted ads on social media are things she buys."
"LS"
Re that last statement...she's obviously spending way too much time online, rather than "farming"
DeleteAnd ALL of the targeted ads are for the GF? Sounds like Jenna roped her into paying for everything. No surprise there.
Twitter Twaddle - Desperate Shameless Beggar Edition:
ReplyDelete"Once is a while asking for support works. I am happy to draw, design, make soap, or sell shares of meat to you - but maybe you just have the means and will to simply help a farm out? And if you raise your hackles at this, too bad. I want to live here while I work on my next book."
Wow...she is FLAT OUT begging today. Why does she act so entitled to other people's money?
"But maybe you just have the means..." (i.e. I know some of you have disposable income, so could you please share your wealth with me? Pretty please??)
And "too bad" if her desperate request rubs people the wrong way? TOO BAD?? Is being the conductor of a human garbage parade a paid position? (Asking for the Pig Shocker)
"I want to live here while I work on my next book"
DeleteI want, I want, I want, I want...
I want to live beyond my means
I want others to pay my mortgage
I want them to buy animal feed
I want them to pay my bills
BTW, there is no new book. She threw that out there to entice past fans of her books to give her free money to write another. But why is she asking her foollowers for a book advance instead of a publisher? Ah, cuz this new book doesn't exist.
Look at the phrasing in this twitter post:
ReplyDelete"Once is a while asking for support works. I am happy to draw, design, make soap, or sell shares of meat to you - but maybe you just have the means and will to simply help a farm out? And if you raise your hackles at this, too bad. I want to live here while I work on my next book."
As though selling soap, sketches, and her own fictionalized memoirs is the only way she can keep a roof over her head.
You don't need "sales" or "help" or "luck" to pay that mortgage, girl. There's a steady income stream, or you'd have been out on your ass years ago. This is just fun money.
Get a job to pay for your own entertainment.
Aug 25th and she says she is just now "saving for" the August mortgage - presumably the payment that was due on the 1st or 15th of August.
DeleteNo one lives like this and gets to keep their home. 👖🔥
Secret 💲💲💲 yet she's 🤲🤲🤲
Oh wait, excuse me - she started "saving" for it on Aug 19th.
DeleteIf you have no more money the following month as you did the month before, that's not saving.
💸💸💸
With all the scamming she's done in the past decade, you'd think she'd have more to show for it.